Giving Thanks

You are wonderful. You bring light to the dark and you do it with grim determination and a good sense of humor. Many people depend on you and you keep going. Its tough as hell and boring at times and hot and cold and the people you love are far away.

You keep doing it. Moving forward.

You are amazing. From all the way over here, I can tell you are amazing. You are so awesome that your awesomeness glows. Thats how awesome you are.

I am thankful for your service. However you spent your Thanksgiving. Just think, you didn't have to deal with the relatives that you just can't seem to like. You love them, but you don't like them.

Thats okay awesome one. That is part of being human.

Thank you Thank You Thank You.

First world problems with Rose

Coming home from getting my daughters holiday photos taken with her tiny cousin, we were stopped for a long long time as hordes of people dressed in University of Michigan or Ohio state colors converged upon us. The stadium holds almost as many people as the entire city I live in.

I don't know about you but hundreds of people milling around my car makes me nervous.

Then I thought of you, the collective you, troops out there making those second to second decisions that change lives and I calmed the hell down.

Still, people milling, getting close.

I have determined that my 'personal space' is approximately 2 football fields. Its getting better as I get older.

More first world news!

I eat a very lean and mean diet. Fresh organic vegetables, fish, chicken, ICED TEA WITH EXTRA LEMON. However, tonight I got a craving so deep that I had to go through the drive through of a certain place that starts with M.

I was raised polite and I simply like being nice to everyone. I also speak clearly because I know that the radio comm might suck. Very clearly I stated my order. I read the order and then I did not get one thing that I ordered, outside of a lukewarm McFish or whatever they are called.

My teenager, thought it was hilarious and insisted I not go back around.

I got sweetened tea - UGH, this is Michigan people, the default is unsweetened. I ordered a large value meal because I wanted the g.d. glass, NO GLASS. Repeat, no glass. No pumpkin pie. Apple pie. My son got a oreo mcflurry.

So huzzah.

I came home to drink my woes away and guess what? The water cooler is empty! No glub glub of delicious cold water.

My teenager VOLUNTEERED to go get me some Smart Water (its gotta work some day - I WILL understand math) and almonds.

Peace is restored. I am not full of crapacola. All is well.

Tomorrow is pretend Thanksgiving. I will put on my purple tights (just the tights, nothing else) and go to my Moms for the annual eating of the bird. My little vegetarians will carb overload on mashed potatoes.

Silently, I will do what I try to do everyday. Make lists of what I am grateful for.

I am grateful that I had the idea to make this blog. Even though I flail about, I hope my sincerity and concern comes through

I am grateful that it seems that the g.d. war is winding down.

I am grateful that there are more programs in place to help with the wounds inside, PTSD for example. I grew up with shattered Vietnam vets.

I am grateful that you get up every morning or night, wearing your uniforms and doing your jobs. I pray to whatever Gods are listening that you all come back whole.

Also, when you come back, make sure your order is correct before you drive away! Do NOT let them give you sweet tea if you want unsweetened tea!

Filling out g.d. Customs Declaration Form Help

Praise Jeebus, Good Goddess, Lakshmi, Oprah and whomever else lead me to this site. The hardest part about sending care packages to the much cared for troops is the form. I get all college exam-y about it and need easy to follow directions. I found them here:

Skip Cares And Makes Things Easy Peasy

Prose in 2 minutes

I never fell in love with war
Or the children burned and running
That man could kill and kill again.

The strength of men and women
Together to do the impossible with spare parts
Guts and caffeine.

Thats where the love comes in
If I could stretch these human arma so far
To over there, to provide protective barrier, I would.

Watch your 6's, bitches.

Adoringly,

Rose

Christmas in November

Ho Ho Ho!

As I put together 4 boxes of deliciousness, humor and good will, I can't keep thinking about how the whole Christmas thing starts around Spring. Or maybe the day after Christmas. This year being a huge economic bummer, except for the banks the gov bailed out. Or rather their CEO's.

Does anyone think that Christmas songs are so frigging sad? Not the intention misery inducing ones about a Mom wanting some shoes, but like 'Silver Bells'? I am sitting here trying to think about the best Christmas song ever. It dawned on me.



The Ramones, a perfect choice for all occasions!

Gabba Gabba Hey!

Rose Team: Force Of One

Dear Troops,

While you, much loved military folks are fighting the good fight and wearing sexy camo, I am in my pajamas with my super soaker plotting my next squirrel attack.

First though, let me say that I love animals. I have dogs and cats and I would have more because that would mean I would have more 'co workers' who didn't care that I 'wore clothes that were tank tops and pajama bottoms'.

Squirrels are another matter. The squirrels around here f*k with me. They are clever and cruel. One time, I spent good money on a squirrel proof bird feeder so I could watch birds eating in the bleak month of January. I put it up and the next day, it was gone. A trail of PREMIUM birdseed trailed off into the woods. Do NOT try to tell me it was neighborhood hooligans bird feeder stealing. I need only to drag my bat of justice down their sidewalk and smile while taking practice swings. Okay, there is one hooligan. I think he is on his way to prison or Boysville or wherever they send sociopaths in training these days.

I saw a squirrel walking slowly across the road today, so full of nuts and my pumpkins, it was all but staggering across the street. At this point in the nut gathering season, they can barely make it up trees. Sometimes they need a coupla running jumps. Then when leap from branch to branch you think a pterodactyl has landed they are so huge. I am talking big domestic cat, small dog sized.



In my constant efforts to give the squirrels boundaries, I have in a token of kindness, bought a pumpkin just for them to destroy, eat, roll in. I am not saying I know much about what squirrels do besides piss me off. They prefer the intricate and not so intricate patterns that we carve onto our pumpkins. I cannot be sure but they like mine the best. After a coupla days of running to the pumpkin and checking it out briefly, then running away, they start getting cocky.

They roll the pumpkins down the hill that is my front yard. In squirrel, that is akin to laughing in my face. This year, they had a 2 course meal with corn shucks. Yea, its on.

They also seem to like hot sauce alot. Because I sprayed the pumpkins with tobasco and if anything, they ate more and rolled more down the hill. We have black squirrels around here too, before I thought they were an exotic species who specialized in eating pumpkins. However, black squirrels are just like black.

Squirrel combatants is what this civilian is dealing with.

Emails printed and delivered to Marines

Taken directly from the site: "Family and friends of deployed Marines in Afghanistan & Iraq can NOW send a letter to be downloaded, printed, and ready for delivery, usually within 24 hours. THE SERVICE IS FREE, PRIVATE and SECURE."

Link To Moto Mail

Night people, Night Moves

In the article "The Evolution of Night Owls" in Psychology Today (Dec, 2009) states that a sudy proves that night people have higher iqs.

The accompanying photo is of a fellow mowing his lawn at night! Great idea, it would be a WONDERFUL way to let my neighbor who starts blowing leaves OUT OF HIS TREES at 6:30 a.m. that the muse strikes around midnight and she doesn't let up until 3ish.

An aside: Let me state for the record that I love my neighbors. The retired teachers main mission is lawn care. The other side is a local NPR on air personality, who has this sexy melting voice but is this tiny harmless looking lady woman. To my knowledge she has never blown Garrison Keillor nor does she have David Sedaris email address. Don't ask me how I know... Jokes people, jokes!

I don't mind him blowing the leaves out of the trees, I figure he is working through something. Or maybe he is REALLY into getting every single Fall leaf off his lawn.

Further on in the article: "Because the nocturnal lifestyle allowed by electricity didn't exist 10,000 years ago, we must now rely on general intelligence to override our early-to-bed instincts. So those with more of it stay up later."

For all you pulling the night shift, this song, is dedicated to you. Also, "The Bob Seger" is from my hometown of Ann Arbor Michigan. This one has easy to sing along with lyrics. Takes you to Summer, to being with someone who makes you gooshy in a good way. Good times to look forward to.

Night Moves,

Rose

Godzilla Love

Are you old enough to remember Saturday afternoon 'Creature Feature' chock full of B movie horror? Thats when I came to love Godzilla. Well, not at first love but now I have a deep down kinda love for Godzilla. As humans and potential Godzillas we all have these moments where we stomp towns, maybe on accident, maybe on purpose.

We must own our inner Godzilla and start again. So much of life is starting again, have you noticed?



What kind of manpower do we have in in Tokoyo ready to battle the big G?

Doesn't that little blue dino look like he is gossiping about how big the triceratops rear end is and is NOT paying attention to the strategy session? Make loud noises, breathe fire, crush cities, repeat.



I prefer blue flame bellowing Godzilla, for the record.

What is the back story of those girls who sang to Mothra to calm her the f down? I am writing ofcourse about the CLASSIC Godzilla vs. Mothra - now the Mothra song been remixed, re sung and botoxed.



Below I have done my best to interpret the song for you:

HumbaHumba!Moth-uruh!OooooWWWWWooooooooooooCalmthefdownmothraHumbaHumba!

Until next time, keep low, if bathing within an actual shower isn't an option, use baby wipes, go to sleep grateful,

Rozilla

I hear that the jambalaya MRE is pretty edible..

Dear Soldiers,

Hello, this is my first go. So here it goes.

I have been a patriot and American loving citizen since I was a tiny girl. My Father served in Korea, I would love to go through the things he brought back. I demanded to sleep on a army cot and somehow, my dream of being a cowgirl would also involve the military.

I am starting this blog because of something I saw on cnn.com, a soldier had posted an article titled 'Have they forgotten we are over here?' The answer is HELL NO.

I was packing up a box to send to some Marines (is Marines capitalized? Do no piss off devil dogs) last night and got this idea. My goals: To amuse, inspire and connect with soldiers serving. I have such gratitude for the work you do and I am fascinated and want to understand the experience of serving.

I am a writer, I work at home, work on a book, raise kids, get tattoos, sleep too much or not enough and read a lot. The novel in progress is called 'Godzilla And Me'. You will be hearing about it and those mountains I am climbing up to put down the words that have defined a bizarre and well lived life, so far.